• Skip to primary navigation
  • Skip to main content
  • Skip to footer

Pause When Agitated

Sober Living Tips

  • Home
  • Popular Posts
  • AA Meetings
  • 12 Steps
  • Sober Living

12 Steps

Anonymity and Social Media

July 5, 2011 by annon

Facebook is the great thing.

It allows people to reconnect and maintain “loose affiliations” over time easily.  MIT researcher Judith Donath in her article Darwin to Facebook suggests this move from more traditional close, tight, and relatively few relationships to looser ones in more volume and less frequency is an evolutionary development. As we have become more mobile in our lives, Donath suggests necessity has driven the development of new communication modalities like Facebook. We are, after all, fundamentally social animals!

Intriguing, isn’t it?

Regardless of the merits of this theory, many AA’s now “friend” each other and log on every day to keep up with the exploits of their sober buddies.

But are we being sensitive to the dictum “everything on the Internet is public!” It is after all, there for all the world to see and can be archived for decades.

So the question to ask is, “am I communicating in a way that respects another’s desire to remain anonymous concerning AA?” This issue is important because a public forum like Facebook can have a broad collection of “friends” that could include coworkers, family members, and future employers. All these folks have the ability to view each and can draw hasty conclusions about their affiliations.

I have seen anonymity broken on a regular basis on Facebook.  Assume positive intent I hope these breaks are due to a lack of understanding of the nature of social media rather than a lack of respect for a person’s desire to remain anonymous.

I good yardstick is before posting or responding on any social media is to ask “would it be OK if this communication was printed on the front page of the newspaper and stored for years?”

Maybe best to practice a little restraint of tongue and pen.

This way anonymity maintains its rightful place as the spiritual foundation of all our principals.

 

Filed Under: 12 Steps

Spiritual Awakening

June 17, 2011 by annon

One of the most grandiose statements in the 12 steps is “having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps!”

A spiritual awakening virtually guaranteed by working the steps? Really?

Were I brand new and looking in I would think, “uh oh, here we go, another religion!”

But AA is not a religion. It may have some dogma, but it most certainly is not a religion.

What it is, is the devotion to a spiritual way of life that involves conscious reflection and effort.

So what exactly is this spiritual awakening?

It is many things, different over time – a bit hard to define.  Perhaps famous AA Chuck C. says it best, “it’s like having a new pair of glasses!”

True! With a spiritual awakening the world starts looking different. Same world, whole new perception.

The Buddhists describe obtaining nirvana as “awakening from a deep sleep.”

Indeed, and how true for the AA!

AA’s who practice the program go  from taker to giver, self-centered to altruistic, and victim to responsible adult.

Want to know if an AA has had a spiritual awakening? Follow them around for a couple days – it will be obvious.

Filed Under: 12 Steps

Being “teachable”

May 18, 2011 by annon

My friend Joe L. has said, “you can sum up the program with one concept, remaining teachable.”

How right he is!

When I am full of ego and pride, I am unwilling to take good orderly direction. I become stubborn and insistent on doing it my way!

I am also quite the joy to be with when I am in this unteachable state!

When I am honest with myself, my inventory reveals that I don’t know it all. Nobody does. This can be about something specific or just in general.  The cliche is true; the more one knows, the more one knows what they don’t know.

The sooner one accepts this, the better off they’ll be.

Once I know that I don’t know that puts me in a position where I can be humble and ask for help.

Help often comes in the form of direction.

If I turn it the direction into action something very spiritual occurs – I change.

Joe might be right, being teachable says so much!

 

Filed Under: 12 Steps

Anonymity – No challenge here.

May 9, 2011 by annon

The New York Times published an article titled, Challenging the Second ‘A’ in A.A by David Colman.

This article questions the value of anonymity and wonders what harm, if any, is done by someone who publicly admits that they are “recovering” or a part of a treatment program.

This debate isn’t a new one. What is new is the willingness of some to even consider changing what is a stated tradition for AA.

While the article mentions the 11th tradition, “Our public relations policy is based on attraction rather than promotion; we need always maintain personal anonymity at the level of press, radio, and films” it fails to cite in the more important 12th tradition. The 12th tradition states (italics added for emphasis), “Anonymity is the spiritual foundation of all our principals, ever reminding us to place principals before personalities.”

So does something “foundational” need to be reexamined?

No, it doesn’t.

What needs to be explored here is what one is doing in their own lives about recovery. Not what they are saying about it.

It is not surprising in today’s celebrity-obsessed ego-driven culture that people want to be associated with something successful like AA. But being associated with AA and succeeding in AA are two different things.

Success in AA requires steady, humble, and yes, anonymous action. That’s what makes it spiritual. After all, it’s called Alcoholic’s Annonymous.

 

Filed Under: 12 Steps

« Previous Page

Footer

The Pause When Agitated Blog says that happiness can be obtained through a full, rich, and sober lifestyle. By sober we mean no mind-alternating unprescribed chemicals. So, no pot.

Tags

10th Step AA and Covid-19 AA Fun advice Anonymity Best Practices change defects ego higher power meditation meetings newcomers peace of mind prayer serenity sobriety spirituality thinking tough love Zoom Meetings
  • Home
  • Useful Links and Resources
  • Subscribe Here….
  • About this site…

Copyright © 2022